


Snake Situations

by amusewithaview



Category: Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter - Laurell K. Hamilton, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, The Sixth Sense (1999)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-27
Updated: 2008-03-27
Packaged: 2019-09-22 14:03:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17061158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amusewithaview/pseuds/amusewithaview
Summary: Slender, silky, scaly, slithering onto your computer screen - SNAKES!





	Snake Situations

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on tthfanfic from 27 March 2008 - 26 July 2008.  
> https://www.tthfanfic.org/Story-15989/amusewithaview+Six+Snake+Situations.htm

###  1\. snake (tummy) ache

Disclaimer: I own naught that you shall see in the following six chapters.

**Crossing: BtVS/The Sixth Sense/hints of something else...**

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Cole rubbed at his eyes tiredly and set down his book. The Crucible was interesting, but the parallels he couldn't help but draw weren't exactly comforting. The fifteen-year-old shivered at the thought of all those unhappy souls, tortured to death for things they didn't do. On the other hand, he supposed that some - maybe one - of them might have been like _him_. Another oh-so-comforting thought.

He stretched in his chair and looked at the clock. **10:30** , great. Tomorrow was going to be a long day. Cole stood and headed for the bathroom to brush his teeth. He fumbled for the switch in the dark and heard something fall. _Shit, hope it wasn't that new soap-dispenser._

He found the switch at last and bent to grab whatever it was that had fallen. "Hairbrush," he muttered to himself as he stood. The hanging mirror reflected his face back at him: sandy-brown hair curling around his ears, big blue eyes that were just a shade too weary for his age and behind him a delicate-looking woman with red hair.

She watched him quietly for a few seconds while he tried to figure out how long she had been standing there. Her hair was still red, her eyes still green - she couldn't have been with him for more than a few minutes. Abruptly the color began to leach from her eyes and hair until she was glowing, ethereal, almost angelic. Her expression became one of total peace broken only when her hair and form had returned completely to her 'base' form.

As he watched, inky blackness began to spread down from her roots, leaching the flush of life from her cheeks. Her eyes became black pools as jagged purple veins stood out against her corpse-white skin. Quickly as the transformation had begun, it reversed, leaving her fresh and almost normal-looking again.

Cole shivered, he knew what was next and, as with each time it happened, he could not look away. Her frail form began to convulse, long gashes appeared on her arms and neck, bleeding sluggishly. A ripple began in her stomach and traveled upwards, twisting her throat and forcing her mouth open into a silent, choked scream.

A black head slithered from her terrified, open mouth. The snake working its way out of her body was enormous, fully six feet long. It wrapped about her shoulders in a loose embrace as the tip of its smooth-scaled tail emerged.

The woman's green eyes regarded him sadly, one bloody hand caressing the head of the snake gently. " _Osiris waits, scion, and I must serve as messenger. Return to the lands where time runs as sands, open the book whose binding is treasured, read the words of loosing unmeasured. Release the Creature with punishment unending, undo the torment of fleshly rending. Finish the binding of warrior and way, aid in the battle of night and day._ "

Her body dissolved into a pile of sand, then even that melted away. Cole turned back to the mirror and brushed his teeth, too used to the message and its creepy messenger to feel any sense of urgency. She would be back.

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A/N: Yes, more FFA. I'm addicted.

###  2\. snake (on the) make

Disclaimer in first chapter.

**Crossing: BtVS/AB**

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Two hands - one tan, the other pale - reached out and grabbed a blue suede boot at precisely the same instant. The owners of said hands looked from shoe to opponent with narrowed eyes, studying each other intently, looking for any sign of weakness.

"I saw it first."

"But we reached for it at the same time."

The tan woman scowled. "Blue isn't your color."

One dark eyebrow rose as the pale woman inspected her adversary, "Nor is it yours, _dear_."

Faint grinding of teeth could be heard. The knuckles of the tan hand clenched so tightly that they became almost as white as the pale woman's fingers. "I'm sure we can settle this nicely. We're both civilized, decent human beings."

"We are?" The pale woman smiled, revealing incisors just a shade too pointy to belong to a 'decent human being'. "Well, that's news to me." She leaned forward just the slightest bit and _sniffed_ above the head of the shorter, tan woman. Her tongue flicked out as if tasting the air and she drew back, dark eyes widening the slightest bit.

Buffy smirked, "I guess neither of us belongs in the 'human' category."

"And civilized might be debatable."

The slayer looked at the blue suede boot, a perfect match for that darling little number she'd seen in Macy's, and just what she wanted to make a good impression... She sighed, "Flip for it?"

One corner of Melanie's red mouth lifted in a dismissive snarl, " _Flip for_ \- " She settled back, rocking on the heels of her red pumps thoughtfully. "Why don't we blow this joint, find another store more equal to our needs." A slow smile began to spread across the lamia's face, "It has been a long while since I found someone _interesting_ to shop with..."

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###  3\. snake (gets a) break

Disclaimer in first chapter.

**Crossing: BtVS/HP**

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"You... glow?"

Dawn blinked. "Ok, that's a new one." She shot a quizzical look at Xander, who shrugged. "Usually Buffy's new boyfriends are all with the sucking up, or in some cases, literally trying to suck the blood from our bodies." The mystical teen smiled, "My sister has a... colorful dating history. You sure you can handle her?"

Harry glanced to the side, where Buffy Summers was standing and laughing with one of her sister Slayers. "Handle her? She doesn't need 'handling'." And she certainly didn't need one Harry James Potter, killer of Dark Lords and auror extraordinaire. Every day she woke up still wanting to be with him was a day he thanked the gods for their favor.

Xander stepped forward, an intent look on his face. "What _do_ you think she needs? You?"

"Merlin, no!" Harry was startled, then thoughtful. "I don't know what she needs," he answered as his eyes were drawn back to the blonde slayer like metal filings to a magnet, "But I hope..." He swallowed, "I hope I can help her figure it out."

He almost fell over with the force of the clap to the back Xander gave him. "Good answer," the one-eyed carpenter grinned. "Now of course, you know that if you hurt her I will hunt you down with a shovel."

"Why a shovel?"

"Makes burying your body afterwards a lot easier."

"Ah, quite."

Dawn drew herself up officiously and stepped forward, Xander flanking her: "Now, we have just a few questions before you go enjoy yourself." She pulled out a pad of paper and a pen, "Are you now or have you ever been evil?"

"Erm, I once had a mystical connection to an undead wizard. He possessed me with it once." Seeing the two Scoobies start to frown, he hastened to reassure them: "But I killed him, for real this time, he's not coming back."

"Alright, next question: are you a werewolf?"

"No, but I have a godson who is." He frowned, "Is that going to be a problem?"

"Oh, no - no, we have a strict drug 'em and chain 'em policy regarding werewolves." Dawn frowned and Xander followed suit, "Do you have any aura-reading capabilities? The ability to see through magic? _Any_ sort of magical sight?"

"No. That is, I don't think so."

"Well phooey, that blows that theory." Dawn scowled, "This doesn't make any sense! Unless you're a dog or a snake in disguise - " She shot him a suspicious look, "You're not, are you?"

"No - "

"Then how can you see the glow?"

"I can talk to snakes," Harry responded slowly. "It's a very rare magical talent called _parseltongue_."

"That explains it," Xander smiled, relieved. "Well, the preliminary evil-boyfriend check is complete. Congratulations, now why don't you go and enjoy the party?"

Harry nodded and started to head for Buffy, he was barely three steps away before he paused and turned back. "Out of curiosity, what would have happened if I had failed?" Identical evil grins had the wizard swallowing nervously as the two Scoobies exchanged looks fraught with meaning.

Dawn's grin widened, "Trust us, Harry - "

" - you don't want to know," Xander finished.


End file.
